Here comes the sun lalalala

Something which just came up on my mind...
I wonder if my nick Doci is already something like an "identity". I mean no matter what my user names are..in the end it's Doci.
I even can't imagine another nick I would like to be called on the Internet.

And then maybe I should also consider thinking that my shape is in need of improvement. I mean, how can you become a better human if you don't set yourself goals. Somehow it's admirable if even Japanese in their 30s or 40s still say things like: "I want to become a blahblah person". But maybe it's a culture thing. I never heard any german person at that age saying he wants to become a better person like that.
Like I somehow have the feeling that in our culture we don't consider improving and learning as a life-long process. Maybe it exists that we want to improve but we rarely talk about such stuff.  Maybe it's also a generation gap or I don't know.

Well, sometimes we have to make compromises it seems. This is totally out of the blue..lol

Hmm if I think about something else. Communication in real life...is somehow quite different from writing via Internet or such things.
I guess I would never talk to anyone about such feelings and thoughts..somehow rl communication seems rather superficial to me in this case.  I mean how often in your life you talk about your feelings like for real, talk about uncomfortable topics which actually make you cry..etc.
Finding a person you can trust so much that you can say such things in their face is tough.

Anyway..thanks for all your birthday wishes. Was really happy (^^)
Unfortunately I am too lazy to answer all your individual wishes with a thank you...I gave up doing that after I got so many messages on different places. (>_<) But don't worry. That doesn't mean I don't like you! XD
And Oh I am sorry for more or less disabling commenting like in every entry.
Somehow I am in a disabling phase.  not that I want to feel untouchable or something. XD But of those here know a way how to communicate with me anyway.

Which reminds me of...I don't like Facebook. Even though I am there I somehow am not in the mood to post "what I am doing there" etc. In this way twitter became much more useful. Though I also must admit that I am spamming there way too much so it's like I reached a point that I have nothing much to chat about here anymore.

Maybe about creepy baked Ryo. Ha looking forward to Joker START! Well somehow I am afraid..cause I have a bad memory of Orthros. Somehow Orthros wasn't that appealing to me in the end. But yeah let's face it..in the last months I changed my fandom habits even more. It's not like I have new fandoms or anything. It's rather like I put some more weight on one scale.
This is somehow impressive however. Rather putting more weight on something passive than on something active. It's crazy. But in the end I guess several things had an influence which made up this temporarily result.

And then I also think of giving my journal a new style again before August is coming up. That's because...August means something like a new start to me..so it would be also good to reflect that here. If you know what I mean...but unfortunately I have no clue about the layout I want xDDD

Did I write enough now? And hey this time It wasn't you-know-who related hurra! Yes I am scary and obsessed like that.

"こっちまで涙が出てくる"

必死で努力をして夢破れても、その姿は美しい。

決して恥じる事ではない

Such beautiful words by him ❤
And you know...it's thanks to Germany's defeat that he thought like this.
After all it also has its advantages, so it's nothing I should be disappointed about if I get such words instead.
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Today is my brother's 35th Birthday ❤
That's all..well it's not only that but I never felt at any time to also point out that it is my own birthday coz I see no reason to mention it.
It's like it would just feel like "Today is my birthday, so tell me "Happy Birthday" bitches!"
I prefer getting happy birthdays just without mentioning it coz there I know "Oh they remembered it's today! Lovely"
But honestly I don't mind if people forget it either because I never enjoy this day either. XD

I am not writing alot lately yes but I don't feel like there is something mentionable.
Went to the dermatologist yesterday with my mum. Seems like my ugly big mole on my back is "good-natured"..so well yeah..one lesser problem to care for.  But even so there are always other things to be bothered.

And why the fuck is white chocolate always so delicious (>__<)